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How to How To Meet Your Apartment Neighbors and Build Community In Your Neighborhood
Jan 14, 2025
Building a sense of community in your apartment complex or neighborhood can feel daunting. With everyone leading busy lives, it’s easy to stay behind the closed doors of your new apartment. But according to Willy Charleton, a board member of The Neighborhood Association of The Back Bay, engaging with your neighborhood and fostering connections is worth it — and not always quite as intimidating as you’d think.
Charleton shared some practical tips on how to make friends, forge meaningful relationships, and create a thriving new community right where you live.
Evaluate Your Circumstances
If you feel like it’s a challenge to build a community in your apartment community, according to Charleton, it’s probably due to a combination of proximity and turnover. “It totally depends on the building,” he explains. “Some of these apartment buildings are really big, where somebody lives on the 10th floor, and you live on the first floor.”
In Boston and other large cities, this complication is compounded by a rather transient population, including students and traveling professionals, which means getting new neighbors every year or two. “You never know if somebody’s visiting, staying short-term, or planting roots,” Charleton says. This constant movement can make introductions feel awkward or fleeting, creating even more of a barrier to forming connections with new friends.
Overcoming Barriers
Despite the seemingly long list of obstacles, making friends with your neighbors doesn’t have to be complicated. “It’s the same as meeting anybody — whether you’re at work or the dog park,” Charleton explains. A simple introduction can go a long way: “Hey, my name’s Willy, I live on the first floor, nice to meet you.” Another favorite of Charleton’s is, of course, the ultimate conversation starter for pet owners: dogs and other furry friends.
Even in larger buildings, where neighbors may feel like strangers, shared spaces provide opportunities for icebreakers. Many modern complexes feature common areas and even host community events and mixers like holiday parties or trivia nights to encourage interactions.
If your building doesn’t hold events but you have a common space, it offers a great opportunity to organize your own. “Just spending time in those shared areas — like the kitchen or lounge — you’ll meet others who are also open to connecting,” Charleton says. These spaces naturally bring together neighbors who are open to engaging and forming connections.
Connect Through Your Neighborhood Association
Neighborhood associations can play a vital role in building community in your new home, offering you a chance to connect over similar interests and local initiatives. In Charleton’s case, the association is deeply rooted in the neighborhood’s history and is run entirely by community members. “There’s a mystery novel book club, a walking group, and more civic-oriented efforts like architectural reviews and parking improvements,” he says.
Associations like these provide a platform for you to get more informed about everything from historical preservation to local restaurant openings. They also foster new friendships between neighbors through casual meetups and hang outs, like get-togethers at local bars. “It’s a great way to meet your neighbors and get involved,” Charleton says.
Optimizing Your Search
If you're looking for an apartment where you can build community, there are ways to steer and strategize your search that can boost your chances of having a sense of community down the road.
First off, pay attention to how the building feels and looks when you tour with your agent. Charleton points out that when neighbors care about the person next door, the place tends to look better—good neighbors are more likely to offer a helping hand, to pick up trash and take care of shared spaces. When the apartment building is a site for connection, it’s more likely to be respected and cared for.
Charleton also suggests getting out there and exploring your new neighborhood on foot instead of relying on what you hear or read: “Go grab a coffee and walk around,” he says. “Spend a couple days checking out different areas to get a feel for what vibe works for you.” While agents can’t give advice about the safety of neighborhoods, taking the time to explore gives you a real sense of the place and whether it feels like the right fit for your vision.
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